#FrankensteinFriday: Tales of Frankenstein (1958)

“From the beginning of time, many men have sought the unknown, delving into dark regions, where lie those truths, which are destined to destroy him.

Of all these eerie adventurers into darkness, none was more driven by insatiable curiosity, nor went further into the unknown than the unforgettable Baron Frankenstein.

“So infamous were his exploits that his name stands forever as a symbol of all that is shocking, unspeakable, forbidden. Thus, in our day, many a story, which chills the soul and freezes the blood, is truly a tale of Frankenstein.

“Now, join us in the mystery, the excitement, and the stimulation that comes when we tell a story so weird, so dark, so harrowing, that it deserves to be called one of the many TALES OF FRANKENSTEIN.

Ho-wdy, Franken-Homies!

Stop.

It’s Hammer Time here at Kinky Ho-rror! 😉 We’re resurrecting another patchwork corpse-creature from the Hammer House of Ho-rror! From 1958, it’s…

Ho-ping to scare up some recognition in the States, Hammer teamed up Columbia Pictures with the intent of creating 26 electrifying episodes of Franken-stories, with each studio handling 13. Howl-ever, the two studios couldn’t agree on what parts to stitch on and the whole thing fell apart.

Hammer wanted the series to be made in the same style as their Curse of Frankenstein, Columbia owned the TV rights to the Universal films and wanted to use that version. The resulting pilot has elements of both, with Anton “The Man Who Could Cheat Death” Diffring as a Cushing-like Baron Frankenstein and Don “The Creature Walks Among Us” Megowan as a flat-headed monster. Legendary Universal screenwriter Curt Siodmak directed the film in the style of a ’40s monster chiller.

This one’s a must-see for Franken-fans! It’s got chills and thrills for both fans of Hammer and cl-Ass-Sick Universal fright fare! Anton Diffring is a wonderful stand-in for Peter Cushing and the Monster’s real groovy! It really is a shame that this series didn’t get picked up, but what we have is shockingly good!

Do you dare face the challenge of Tales of Frankenstein?!

Happy #FrankenFriday, Kinky Ho-mies!! 🙂 xoxo

News Bleed: The “Lara Croft vs. Ghostface” Edition

The original Ghostface mask returns in Scream Season 3!!! 🙂 SyFy

Lara Croft raids again in the new Tomb Raider trailer! 🙂Variety

The new TMNT figures are… MONSTROUS! Bleeding Cool

Target unleashes exclusive Universal Monsters goodies! 🙂 Bloody Disgusting

Cult of Chucky will slash its way to Netflix this October! IGN

Linda Hamilton will be back in the new Terminator picture! 🙂 Hollywood Reporter

Splatterday Mourning Cartoon: Monster Force – The Rage of Frankenstein’s Bride

Ho-wdy, cartoon creeps!

It’s Splatterday Mourning again, and we’ve got the perfect cartoon caper to make you scream!

This week’s abominable animation is Monster Force, a 13-episode series by Universal Cartoon Studios and Canadian studio Lacewood Productions. The story is set in approx. 2020 and centers around a group of teenagers (with attitude!!!) fighting the Universal Monsters with futuristic weaponry. It’s a series that proves that Universal has been trying to do the “Dark Universe” thing long before Tom Cruise and The Mummy.

Both Monster Force and The Mummy resurrected the grand ol’ monsters, but with less scares and more radical action. The “Dark Universe” was clearly inspired by the success of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, and this series actually got Marv freakin’ Wolfman to write some episodes! I guess it makes some sense… there always was a strange connection between superheroes and monsters….
Considering that nobody ever talks about this one, it’s actually a lot of fun! It’s G.I. Joe fighting cl-Ass-Sick fiends with sci-fi weapons…and every bit as cool as it sounds! 🙂 It even manages to sprinkle in some references to the actual films. Heck, the score in today’s episode quotes the score of Bride of Frankenstein! Plus, check out these monsters:
Groovy.
Check it out below…Happy Splatterday, Kinky Kreeps! 🙂 xoxo

#TerrorTrailerTuesday: The “Invisible Touch” Edition

Ho-wdy, Ho-rror Ho-mies!

On this #TerrorTrailerTuesday, we’re paying tribute to a groovy cat who’s real outtasight…

Yes, it’s the Invisible Man, the villain beyond vision! The fiend who can’t be seen! The scourge of locker rooms everywhere! H.G. Wells’ Fantastic Sensation!

While we take it for granted these days, the idea of the invisible man is truly frightening (and ho-rnifying… ;)) one. To quote Claude Rains as the invisible one, “An invisible man can rule the world. Nobody will see him come, nobody will see him go. He can hear every secret. He can rob, and rape, and kill!” I mean, there’s a reason that ho-rror filmmakers have been telling Invisible Man stories for decades now. The threat has all the malevolence and cunning of a sinister genius, but with no way of detecting him.

Of corpse, others have seen the funny side of this kinky kreep. After all, the Invisible Man can’t be invisible without going… au naturel. I daresay there are just as many Invisible Man comedies as there are terror tales. Even James Whale’s The Invisible Man is loaded with large helpings of black comedy. Guess you can’t spell “slaughter” without “laughter”… 😉

Whether you like him scary, silly, or just plain seXXXy, it’s as clear as the monster himself that the Invisible Man is a true icon.
So without further a-BOO, here are the terrifying trailers to top off your #TerrorTuesday. 🙂 xoxo

Ho-rrificly Ho-rnifying Bonus: The seXXXy scene that launched a zillion Invisible Man fantasies (at least for me ;)).

News Bleed: The “Rampage of the Crooked Man” Edition

The Conjuring 2’s The Crooked Man will walk a crooked mile to his own film. 🙂 Variety

Jeepers! The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles will meet the Universal Monsters (including Chris “Fright Night” Sarandon as Dracula) this season! Bloody Disgusting

Dwayne Johnson shows off some post-monster destruction in this new Rampage set photo. Dread Central


The Mist series won’t be a “monster show”… boo to that! 🙁 Screen Rant

The Elfman cometh… Danny Elfman is doing the score for Justice League! 🙂
io9

Yo Shiva! The Walking Dead Gets GI Joe-Style Figures exclusive to San Diego Comic Con! 🙂 CBR

Thanks, Caped Crusader… the Bat-Signal will shine over L.A. to honor Adam West. 🙂 Hollywood Reporter

Sadly, Anita Pallenberg of Barbarella fame has passed away. 🙁 The Guardian

#SupernaturalSaturday Movie Review: The Mummy (2017)

Ass-uming you’ve never seen it, 1932’s The Mummy may be a tad unexpected. For a film that inspired an entire sub-genre of mummy monster movies, it bares very little resemblance to subsequent films. There aren’t any real action set pieces and the story is a strangely poetic fantasy of a love that transcended the ages. The tit-ular mummy (played by the beyond great Boris Karloff) is only bandaged for a short time at the beginning, so there’s very little shambling. It’s a deliberately paced film with gloomy, eXXXpressionistic atmosphere. After over 80 years of other mummies in its wake, the film still feels unlike any other film to feature a bandaged ghoul. One such film that it has very little in common with is 2017’s The Mummy.

Universal actually has a history of rebooting this particular monster. While commonly referred to as “sequels,” the truth is that the Mummy films of the 1940s were hardly a continuation of the Karloff original, despite the first installment’s (The Mummy’s Hand) use of sets and footage from it. Imhotep of the original was replaced with Kharis, the shambling mummy most audiences vaguely recall. The Kharis films moved at a faster pace, had more action, and more comedy. They were all a great deal of fun, but none of them came close to the beautifully eerie original. When Universal took another crack at the sarcophagus with 1999’s The Mummy, they clearly found more inspiration in Kharis than Imhotep, although they did borrow the latter’s name.
With this new Mummy, it seems that the filmmakers drew from the 1999 film more than any of the other previous films. There’s hardly an ounce of Karloff left in it. In essence, it’s the reboot of the reboot of a film made 85 years prior. With that in mind, it’s pretty easy to divorce it from the first film. And as one in a long line of monster movies, It’s pretty enjoyable. If viewed as just a bit of fun monster nonsense, it’s a good deal of fun. This film is precisely the sort of film you should be watching with an eXXXtra large soda in one hand and a plastic tray of nachos (and/or Twizzlers and Reeses’s Cups :)) in the other.
I’m also pleased to report that, for the most part, the film is a ho-rror film. That is to say that there’s a good deal of zombie-ish mummies, creepy critters, terrible curses, shocks, thrills, and soul-sucking. I doubt there’s anything that’ll give you lasting nightmares, but it’s always fun to see some theme park-y scares on the big screen. The action and spook-scares compliment each other nicely and make for a groovy night at the movies. While I would’ve preferred something a little more Gothic, what we have pretty entertaining.
The film stars Tom Cruise as a scrappy treasure hunter (very similar to Brendan Fraser’s Rick O’Connell) and Sofia Boutella as the tit-ular Mummy. Mr. Cruise seems like he’s having a blast and gives charm to a somewhat jerky character. Ms. Boutella is striking and fairly menacing as the Mummy, but she really isn’t given much too do. This version of the monster is devoid of any of the tragedy of the role once had. As much as I enjoy Mr. Cruise (and trust me, I do!! :)), I do wish they had focus more on the Mummy as a character. Instead, she seems like secondary figure in what should be her film. Also in the film is Russell Crowe in the role(s) of Dr. Jekyll  and… you know who. He’s fun in the film, but it seems like they plan on eXXXploring that character(s) in a potential sequel.

The Mummy is intended to be the first in a series of new Universal Monster Movies and I do ho-pe it does well enough for sequels. By no means is this a great film, but it’s a fun popcorn flick. The Universal Monsters are among my dearest ho-mies, so any eXXXcuse to bring them back is fine by me. Ho-pefully, the sequels will embrace the Gothic nature of the original films and bring back some of the cl-ass-ical horror that made them immortal. For now, The Mummy is monstrous enough for me. To a new world of Gods and Monsters.

#FBF: The “Frankenstein Resurrectus” Edition

Happy The Mummy Release Day, Monster Mashers! 🙂
The film marks the beginning of Universal’s Dark Universe, a series of interconnecting monster movies featuring our favorite ghouls of the past. While we wish they had stuck to pure Gothic Ho-rror, anything that brings attention to Cinema’s Greatest Monsters is worth supporting. And it only makes sense that the Universal Monsters would join in on “shared universe” craze. After all, they created the cinematic sci-fi crossover with 1943’s Frankenstein Meets the Wolfman.

Ho-wever, while The Mummy is the first attempt to start a franchise to under the Dark Universe banner, it wasn’t the first attempt to eXXXhume the great monsters…
Back in the late ’90s, Universal had planned a straight Black-and-White throwback to the classic Frankenstein films, done entirely in CGI! In October 1998, The Hollywood Reporter announced that Universal head (;)) Casey Silver had green-lit the film for release in 2000. The film was set to be the first full-length animated feature by Industrial Light & Magic and was budgeted at 80 million dollars. If all of that wasn’t enough, The Wolfman was also supposed to be in the picture!

Alas, this beautiful nightmare was not meant to be. The project died, but Universal did resurrect the creeps in 2004’s Van Helsing. Oy.
Only 16 seconds of test footage exists for the film, but it’s pretty fang-tastic! The tower is perfect and Frankie’s got those Karloff-ish good looks we all love so very much.  How magical would it have been to have a modern monster film like this?! Hopefully, if the Dark Universe goes on, we may get some installments that have that classic Universal Monsters flavor.

For 16 seconds of pure Monster Magic, check out the video below:

News Bleed: The “THE GREAT WAR IS HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Edition

Finally…YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MSN

Another reason to shoot your load… 😉 Hollywood Reporter

Get your first taste of Netflix’s Castlevania! 🙂 i09

Check into Hotel Transylvania: The Series this June! 🙂 Cartoon Brew

Sneak a peek at the Alien 6 Film Collection and the Alien: Covenant Steelbook! IGN

The Resident Evil film franchise is set to rise from the grave with a reboot. (It’s been so long since the Final Chapter came out…IN DECEMBER!!! ;))  Variety

Tom “Spider-Man Not Child’s Play” Holland swings into an Uncharted prequel film. 🙂 Deadline

Cujo will leave his paw print on The Dark Tower. 🙂 Dread Central

The Tales from the Crypt Complete Series Set screams its way onto DVD on Robert Englund’s and my birthday…BEST PRESENT EVER!! :)) Bloody Disgusting

In #NotHorrorButSuckIt news, Tom Cruise confirms that Top Gun II is happening. That Maverick! 🙂 Screen Rant


To a new world of Gods and Monsters… Universal gets serious with their new monster series, now known as the Dark Universe! 🙂 Nerdist

And, sadly, we had to say goodbye to the great Roger Moore this week R.I.P., Mr. Bond. 🙁 xoxo Movie Web

 

#TBT: The “Monster Mufflers” Edition

Ho-wdy, Ho-rror Ho-mies! As you creeps probably know, the Universal Monsters are getting a brand-new shared universe, and they’re hoping to give Marvel a run for their “mummy!”
We here at KH love a good Monster Mash, especially one from the original House of Horrors.  Starting with 1943’s Frankenstein meets the Wolfman, Universal has had a rich history of having grand ol’ ghouls go face-to-fang. However, there are two iconic monsters that have yet to appear in the same film…

Yes, it’s true… The Mummy and The Invisible Man, Universal’s baddest bandaged baddies, have never co-starred in a film together! Now, I know there’s a fair chance that the “wrap” stars will appear together in an installment of the new franchise, but it’s been over 80 years! You would think that Universal would throw us an invisible and/or mummified bone, but they never did.

However, the gauze ghouls did get a chance to share the spotlight in a commercial for Meineke Mufflers in 1988. Not only are The Mummy and The Invisible Man here, but they are positively horrible.. in a good way! 🙂 That Mummy could stomp around in a real monster movie, as far as I’m concerned! I don’t recall the Invisible One being much of a driver, but I suppose The Mummy would need a new a muffler for the ol’ chariot… 🙂

It’s not Universal, but it does the trick!

Check out the creepy commercial below:

#FBF: The “Beetlejuicing in the Graveyard” Edition

Ho-wdy, Kinky Ho-mies! As Bobby “Boris” Pickett taught us, monsters love to bust a move…when they aren’t bustin’ heads! 😉 To help prove that, Universal Studios gathered up their grooviest ghoulies and took them to the stage to shock ‘n’ roll! Beetlejuice’s Rockin’ Graveyard Revue was a theme park show hosted by…wait for it…Beetlejuice!!! 🙂

The Ghost with the Most was joined by Dracula, The Wolfman, Frankenstein, The Bride of Frankenstein, and The Phantom of the Opera… Talk about Monsters of Rock! Our beloved monsters first appear in their classic costumes, but go ghoulishly glam after the first minute.

(You gotta love this Phantom, who looks like an unholy hybrid of Sting, David Bowie, and The Joker!)

Since yesterday was the 29th anniversary of Beetlejuice, I thought I’d eXXXhume this Monster Mash and present ya with a birthday BJ… 😉 Enjoy the fab flashback, freaky fiends! 🙂 xoxo