Creepy Comic Carnival: The “You Big Dummy” Edition

Dedicated to Don Rickles. xoxo

“Ladies and gentlemen, attention please!
Come in close, so everyone can see!
I got a tale to tell.
A listen don’t cost a dime..
..And if you believe that, we’re gonna get along just fine!”

Salutations from the Carnival, culture vultures! Our dead-lining act is real wooden one from the demented dummies at EC Comics! It concerns a voice-thrower with a secret so shocking, it’ll leave you speechless! From the putrid pages of Tales from the Crypt #28, it’s The Ventriloquist’s Dummy!

Y’know, my fabulously freaky friends… horror dummies are a rather dull bunch. They either come to life to engage some rather tired terror or they play mind games with weak-minded. Well. our performer ain’t no dummy-dummy! This seasoned pro has an act that’s really FLESHED out! Impressively, for a monster from the ’50s, there ain’t a single termite to be found. Armed with a twinning secret, this old-timer is ready to show Today’s dull dolls how it’s done!

For your amusement and education, I give you The Ventriloquist’s Dummy!

Heh. How’s that for a punchline, creeps? I gotta HAND it to Larry: he kept his brother close!

Of course, with a yelp yarn this disgusting, HBO just had to take a stab. They got a Scream Team to Hand-le this one! Richard “The Omen” Donner helmed this doll scripted by Frank “The Walking Dead” Darabont. The late. great Don Rickles played the ventriloquist with a fistful of terror. As a terror-ific tribute to the creep-comic, Rickles’ voice-thrower shares a last name with artist “Ghastly” Graham Ingels. Don’t be a dummy! Check out this Chiller-Diller below!

Sorry, Folks! The Carnival is closed. All Out and Over, All Out, All Over!

Creepy Comic Carnival: The “Pranks for Nothing!” Edition

(Submitted by that Interdimensional Man of Mystery known only as…The Talker. Thanks for this festive fiXXX, Ho-rror Ho-mie! :)) xoxo

“Ladies and gentlemen, attention please!
Come in close, so everyone can see!
I got a tale to tell.
A listen don’t cost a dime..
..And if you believe that, we’re gonna get along just fine!”

Step right up, my foolish friends! To-day is indeed a rare one: April Fools’ Day. What a truly glorious howl-iday this! Ghouls and boils are encouraged to commit as many horrible, nasty acts to their “friends” and “loved ones” as possible, and the victims are just supposed to laugh it off ’cause tradition! Heck, lyin’ is grinned upon, if you do it well enough! It’s cruel! It’s mean! It’s a gas! Even your old boney Talker likes to gag around on this day! Why, about an hour ago, I gave a fellow a peanut can full of snakes… Cobras, that is!

If there’s any group of creeps who appreciate a sick joke, it’s the fine fiends over at EC Comics! Their joke concerns two doctors and a corpse that’s not quite dead. Puzzled, my abominable audience? See, I’m not the sort to spoil a good punchline, so I’ll let the comic tell this twisted joke. Chickens need not read on! With sickening artwork by Jack Davis, this one will surely knock ya dead! From the putrid pages of Tales from the Crypt #37, it’s Dead Right!

Still craving some jolting japes, folks? Well, good ol’ Horrorwood’s got ya covered! See, when HBO’s Tales from the Crypt was still hauntin’ the airwaves, they adapted just about every EC chiller-diller they could get their slimy claws on, including Dead Right! Under the new title of Abra Cadaver, the HBO skeleton crew made the men brothers and added some good ol’ fashioned nudity and a tinge o’ gore! For your amusement and education, I present Citizen Kane

APRIL GHOULS’!

Sorry, Folks! The Carnival is closed. All Out and Over, All Out, All Over!

Kreepy Komic Karnival: The “Swamp Pop” Edition

(Submitted with all the love by the mysterious being known only as…”The Talker”. Thanks for sharing this with us, Mysterious One. 😉 xoxo)

Dedicated to Bernie Wrightson.

“Ladies and gentlemen, attention please!
Come in close, so everyone can see!
I got a tale to tell.
A listen don’t cost a dime..
..And if you believe that, we’re gonna get along just fine!”

Gather from far, gather from near! Your ol’ pal The Talker is back and DEADER than ever! I’ve got an act lined up today that’ll shake you to your roots! A real show stopper that make you GREEN around the gills! Part Man! Part Plant! All Monster! Ladies and Gentlemen, the incredible SWAMP THING!

You folks may be familiar with a Dr. Alec Holland, the scientist who became the Swamp Thing via a freak accident. Well, he ain’t the creep I’m talkin’ about! Swamped, are ya? Well, fiends and friends, our star performer of the evenin’ is an Alex Olsen, the first Swamp Thing! In 1971’s House of Secrets #92, the late Bernie Wrightson and Len Wein drained the  swamp and gave us Swamp Thing, a one-off spook short centered around Ol’ Green-‘n’-Gruesome! Alex Olson  is man caught in a Bermuda Love Triangle that results in a terrible explosion that turns him into the florid freak we all know and love!

So popular was this terror tale that DC gave Swampy his own series the following year, introducing the popular Alec Holland version. Unfortunately for fright-seekers, Swampy’s solo series swayed towards superheroics more than somber scares.  Swamp Thing in House of Secrets wasn’t exactly evil, but he had more in common with Frankenstein than Superman. Alex Olson’s story would bring a tear to my eye… if I still had one. This gothic gem is about  loneliness and the beauty of the beast… peppered with some good ol’ comic violence, of course!


For amusement and education, I give you Swamp Thing!

Sorry, Folks! The Carnival is closed. All Out and Over, All Out, All Over!

Creepy Comic Carnival: The “Heartbreaker” Edition

(Submitted by that Super Mysterious Man o’ Mystery known only as “The Talker”…Thanks, you Magically Mysterious Manster, you!! 😉 xoxo)

“Ladies and gentlemen, attention please!
Come in close, so everyone can see!
I got a tale to tell.
A listen don’t cost a dime..
..And if you believe that, we’re gonna get along just fine!”

Gather ’round, gather ’round!  It’s time to take a ride on our dilapidated, safety-violating Tunnel of Love here at The Carnival! Valentine’s Day is creeping up on us, so your humble Talker is here to break your heart in two with another Clas-Sick from the certifiable creeps at EC Comics! This time, we’re going to peak under the tent and take a look at Poetic Justice, a vicious Valentine’s Day tale that’ll make you puke up your candy hearts!!

Poetic Justice is a pure EC story in every sense of the word. You have some really nasty fellows picking on a saint of a man to the point of his death… and some EC-style vegeance from beyond the grave. “Ghastly” Graham Ingels’ delivers on the “Ghastly” goods, with drippy corpses that ooze off of the page. What we have here is a compact little chiller-diller with a gloriously sick punchline that’ll stop your heart… but then I’ve said too much! Get ready for an arrow through the heart, ’cause this is  Poetic Justice!

If you sickos are still craving some Valentine’s violence, allow me to offer forth this grisly gem from Amicus’ 1972 take of Tales from The Crypt. You get the same tawdry tale… but with terror titan Peter Cushing, in the role he was born to play… a zombie! Get a mop, folks… this one gets real messy at the end! For your amusement and education, I present to you Amicus’ Poetic Justice!

Sorry, Folks! The Carnival is closed. All Out and Over, All Out, All Over!