#WaybackWednesday: The “My First Xenomorph” Edition (aka Happy Alien Day!)

Happy Alien Day, Xeno-Homies! Is that eXXXcitement you’re bursting with… or are you having a “John Hurt” moment? Either way, you’re in the right frame of mind! 🙂
The Alien series is just about the greatest Sci-Fi/Horror franchise in the cosmos. It has some perfectly gruesome monsters, tons of thrills & kills, and one of the most badass badasses in the history of badassery in the form of Ms. Ellen Ripley. Even the worst installments in the franchise (I’m looking at you, Alien3!) are still solid monster movies and that is beyond rare for any franchise. In short, the Alien series kicks all the Xenomorph ass! 🙂

In ho-nor of the frightening franchise, I thought we’d look at the heart of any sci-fi franchise… TOYS!!! 🙂
The Alien series is a dark, grotesque series of gory horror films loaded with lots o’ swearing and phallic imagery… so it only makes sense to make a toyline based on it! Well, that’s what the folks at Kenner thought! In 1979, Kenner brought the terror and gloom of Ridley Scott’s Alien to toy shelves everywhere with a target set, a board game, a “movie viewer,” and an 18″ action figure based on the extra-TERROR-strial.

The latter of those (understandably) frightened the heck out of folks back then. Parents bombarded the company with a good many angry letters about how terrifying the 18″ horror was. Parental outrage and poor sales forced Kenner to pull the figure off shelves, so I guess you don’t need to blast an alien into space to kill it…
Kenner’s figure may have died, but, like Ripley in the fourth film, it was resurrected decades later in a big, bad way. In 2014, a toy company called Gentle Giant a released 24″ reproduction of the original 18″ figure. The fear figure retailed at $500… and sold out almost immediately!


Since that initial failure, Alien has spawned many successful toy lines, including an Aliens-based one by Kenner in the 1990s.

Those ’70s suckas may not have been ready for the radness, but Alien has since proven to be an unstoppable force in merchandising. Thank you, Kenner… you gave us one of the coolest monster toys of all time and opened the airlock for decades of awesome Alien toys.
Check out the commercial below for a classic Alien Attack:

Happy Alien Day, Kinky Ho-s…Here’s a ho-rrorday hug for ya! 😉 xoxo

 

News Bleed: The “The Nun Gets a Clue” Edition

This new Clue (1985) documentary will unravel the mystery. (PS- #FUCKYEAHCLUEROCKS!!!!! 🙂 Bloody Disgusting
New plot details emerge for Rampage and it sounds like a monstrously good time! 🙂 MovieWeb
The tree-mendous From Hell it Came creeps onto Blu-ray. 🙂 Dread Central

The unbelievable Night Trap gets an unbelievable re-release on PS4 & Xbox One! 🙂 Polygon

Jeff Goldblum, uh, finds a way into Jurassic World 2! 🙂 Hollywood Reporter

Taissa Farmiga of AHS fame will scare the holy heck out of us in The Nun! Entertainment Weekly

Stephen King will shine in a Mr. Mercedes cameo. (Ps- #FUCKYEAHSTEPHENKINGROCKS!!! :)) JoBlo

#MonsterMaskMonday

Ho-wdy, ho-mies! Just a quickie to let you know about this new feature I’m starting. I have a vast collection of rad as heck Monster Masks, and I figured I’d start sharing them with you, Kinky Ho-style.

This week’s selection is Shorty (Killer Klowns from Outer Space) from Trick or Treat Studios. (Spoiler Alert: A LOT of my masks are going to be from them. I’m a huge fan of their work! :))

Have a wicked week, Kinky Ho-mies…Here’s a lil’ sumthin’ to get things started off on a rockin’ note. 😉 xoxo

News Bleed: The “Ripley vs. Re-Animator” Edition

The Friday the 13th game gets a release date…and it’s soon!!!! Rejoice, Friday fiends!!
Screen Rant


Arrow Video re-animates Re-Animator with a brand-new Collector’s Edition! 🙂 JoBlo
The Predator‘s hunt has been moved up to Summer 2018. MOVIEWEB

The truth is still out there… The X-Files returns… again! 🙂 The New York Times
Sigourney Weaver resurrected Ripley for Stephen ColbertBloody Disgusting

And, sadly, Hammer Horror star Yvonne Monlaur has passed away. 🙁 Horror Society

And Erin Moran has also passed away…R.I.P., Shortcake. 🙁 CNN


Happy Birthday, Crispin Glover & Clint Howard!! :)

Happy Birthday to two site favorites: Clint Howard and Crispin Glover!

Both Mr. Glover and Mr. Howard are among the most beloved actors in the world of cult cinema. Neither one is your average leading man, but they’d be far less intriguing if they were.

Crispin Glover is one of the most unique personalities in cinema. He has appeared in blockbuster crowd-pleasers, but his heart clearly lies with the darker, challenging side of film. As an artist in many fields, Mr. Glover is always provocative and has the uncanny ability to perturb viewers in fascinating ways. While the average film-goer may recognize him as the nebbish father in Back to the Future, Glover’s acting work has included everything from slasher films (Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter), art films (Dead Man), big-budget fantasy (Alice in Wonderland), offbeat crime films (Wild at Heart), black comedies (Nurse Betty), and other varied films. No matter the film, Glover always brings an intensity and strange quality that is all his own. Glover has brought his surreal talents to directing with What Is It? and It Is Fine! Everything Is Fine, both part of a planned “It” trilogy. There’s no denying that Glover is a true original.

Clint Howard will (to the general public, anyway) always be known simply as “Ron Howard’s brother”,  but has Ron had memorable roles on three different versions of Star Trek? No, but Clint sure has! In fact, Clint has had a pretty legendary career in his own right. Starting in 1963, Clint Howard has been in… well, just about everything. Mr. Howard is the ultimate character actor. He’s been in countless iconic television shows, horror movies (including The Ice Cream Man, a favorite of our fearless ho-stess!), comedies (the first two Austin Powers movies, among many others.), has gone face-to-face with Captain Kirk and Dr. McCoy on the original Star Trek series, and was Roo (!) in two Disney Winnie the Pooh shorts! In 1998, Howard won the MTV Lifetime Achievement Award. It was clearly a gag, but it shouldn’t have been. Clint Howard has been around for over four decades and has produced many roles and moments that will be remembered by fans forever. If that isn’t award-worthy, we don’t know what is.

 In honor of these two eccentric gentlemen, we thought it would be appropriate to have a little music… performed by the birthday boys, of course! The first is a new wave rocker performed by Clint Howard and the Kempsters, the second is Crispin Glover doing his best (and the all-time best) Olivia Newton-John in The Orkly Kid. Both performances are delightfully strange, and we wouldn’t have it any other way.

Happy Birthday, Boys!

 

News Bleed: The “Grasshopper Labyrinth” Edition

I just came. 😉 Bloody-Disgusting

Bill Condon is in talks to bring the Bride of Frankenstein to life. 🙂 Deadline
Edgar Wright may be facing amazing colossal insects in Grasshopper Jungle. /FILM

The director of Evil Dead and Don’t Breathe dances into a new Labyrinth. 🙂 The Guardian
Robert Englund’s Scarecrow spreads fear in this new Injustice 2 trailer! 🙂 Flickering Myth

William Castle’s daughter scares us with never-before-seen pictures from the set of Strait-Jacket! 🙂 Dread Central

And in truly heartbreaking news, fellow horror blogger James Harris A.K.A. Doc Terror has passed away. I didn’t know him personally, but I loved his blog. A few years ago, I won one of his giveaways and he sent me a sweet-ass Dario Argento mirror for answering a question about the Friday the 13th series. I love it, and will cherish it even more now. <3

R.I.P. Doc Terror, and thank you for everything. 🙁 Bloody Disgusting

 

Goon Review: Castlevania III: Dracula’s Curse Soundtrack

(Submitted by Mr. Andrew Peters…Rock on, Ho-rror Ho-mies! 😉 xo)

Even though Castlevania II: Simon’s Quest wasn’t a hit with the fans, Konami still made a sequel, but decided to bring it back to its original roots and becoming more of the simple side-scrolling game that the first Castlevania was. Castlevania III: Dracula’s Curse wasn’t just a retread. Not only was it a prequel to the first game, taking place centuries before those events, it also offered the player the ability to switch between playable characters and also take branching paths during certain points in the game. That’s Konami for you. Well, the old Konami. Always thinking outside the box.

The music this time around was different, but still in the same spirit, if that makes sense. In Dracula’s Curse, the tone seems to be much darker and it lacks that poppy punch (that’s the best way that I can describe it) that Simon’s Quest had. I guess the idea was to make it seem more gothic horror, having a much more metallic tinge and slower pace. It certainly fits the image that would pop into your head when you think of Dracula; a dark, blue evening with a full moon reflecting on a thick fog that masks danger. However coming off of Simon’s Quest that arguably has the best score in the entire series, Dracula’s Curse seems to lack that action-hearted punch. Not to say that it’s bad or anything, I just enjoy Simon’s Quest more thoroughly. The soundtrack, not the game.

Mondo’s presentation of Dracula’s Curse, however, is not lacking. The original artwork from Sachin Teng is hypnotically eye catching, making your brain try and piece it all together. Another thing you’ll notice right away is that this soundtrack is spread across two 12″ 180 Gram LPs, one Famicom and the other NES. Both versions have the same 28 tracks (which, by the way, is amazing amount of tracks for an NES game), but once again just as with Simon’s Quest, the Famicom version has a much more rustic sound than the NES version and for this soundtrack, I actually prefer the Famicom version. I feel like it has a much more gothic horror and atmospheric sound and it fits what I feel the game was trying to accomplish. Having said that, I do like the NES version of Stage 01, Beginning and Stage 06, Demon Seed better. Both have a higher energy that their Famicom counterparts don’t seem to have and those are some jazzy, energetic tracks. Konami Kukeiha Club once again did a fantastic job capturing a nightmarish batch of tunes perfectly fitting for a Castlevania game.

The records themselves are really beautiful too. The vinyls I received are orange with some black splatter all over them with tinges of white or silver here and there. There is a variant for you collectors out there, disc one is Trevor Bronze and Alucard Black and disc two is Grant Maroon and Sypha Blue. I haven’t seen those for myself, but I can imagine they are quite a sight to behold.

There’s no better way to celebrate the 30th anniversary of the Castlevania series than with these Mondo soundtracks. Castlevania III: Dracula’s Curse goes for $30 and while the split colored version is sold out, the orange with black splatter is still available, so get it while it’s hot.

 

Happy Mystery Science Theater 3000 Season 11 Release Day!!!

SUPER IMPORTANT UPDATE: I FOUND MY CREDIT!!!

We now return you to your regularly scheduled “MST3K Yay!” post…

Ho-wdy, my Mysterious MSTIES! It’s time to get yo happy on, for the ‘Bots are back in town!!! 🙂

Netflix just made the not-too-distant future the right-this-minute present with the release of Mystery Science Theater 3000 Season 11! Following a HUGELY successful Kickstarter campaign (which your Ho-stess happily contributed to! :)), MST3K has risen from the grave with a brand new bag o’ cheesy clas-sicks for ya! The original series is one of the most beloved series in all of nerd-dom and this new one seems to properly capture that ol’ Satellite of Love charm. 🙂

In ho-nor of the Return of MST3K, I thought I’d send some cheesy trailers…the worst I can find! Each trailer is for a film featured on the new MST3K. In total, there are 14 new movies for the hapless ho-st and the ‘Bots to “suffer” through. This new batch of films is made up of some the most delicious cinematic cheese, so I recommend you check them out both with and without Shadowrama. Two of them feature Caroline “Forever Goddess” Munro (Starcrash, At the Earth’s Core), so you know you’re in for some great B-movie awesomeness. 🙂

Check out the trailers below:

Reptilicus

Cry Wilderness

The Time Travelers

Avalanche

The Beast of Hollow Mountain

Starcrash

The Land That Time Forgot

The Loves of Hercules

Yongary: Monster from the Deep

Wizards of the Lost Kingdom

Wizards of the Lost Kingdom II

Carnival Magic

The Christmas That Almost Wasn’t

At the Earth’s Core

Welcome Back, MST3K. It’s good to hear you riffing again. 🙂 xoxo


News Bleed: The “Tales of Blackenstein” Edition

First, the bummer news…

J. Geils has passed away. 🙁 USA Today

Netflix haunts with The Haunting of Hill House! 🙂 Deadline

I hope they serve whiskey in Hell… Hellboy gets his own brand of whiskey! Whiskey Critic

IT’S ALIVE!!!! Severin brings Blackenstein to Blu-ray! 🙂 Dread Central

John Carpenter will chill us with Tales of Science Fiction!

These new Hellraiser: Judgment images will tear your soul apart! Bloody Disgusting

The new Boomerang streaming service launches and will make every morning a Saturday morning. 🙂 Variety

P.S. House of 1000 Corpses came out 14 years ago today, so John Squires of Bloody Disgusting just dug up these spooky-cool DVD menus! Happy Birthday, Captain Spaulding! 🙂

Creepy Comic Carnival: The “You Big Dummy” Edition

Dedicated to Don Rickles. xoxo

“Ladies and gentlemen, attention please!
Come in close, so everyone can see!
I got a tale to tell.
A listen don’t cost a dime..
..And if you believe that, we’re gonna get along just fine!”

Salutations from the Carnival, culture vultures! Our dead-lining act is real wooden one from the demented dummies at EC Comics! It concerns a voice-thrower with a secret so shocking, it’ll leave you speechless! From the putrid pages of Tales from the Crypt #28, it’s The Ventriloquist’s Dummy!

Y’know, my fabulously freaky friends… horror dummies are a rather dull bunch. They either come to life to engage some rather tired terror or they play mind games with weak-minded. Well. our performer ain’t no dummy-dummy! This seasoned pro has an act that’s really FLESHED out! Impressively, for a monster from the ’50s, there ain’t a single termite to be found. Armed with a twinning secret, this old-timer is ready to show Today’s dull dolls how it’s done!

For your amusement and education, I give you The Ventriloquist’s Dummy!

Heh. How’s that for a punchline, creeps? I gotta HAND it to Larry: he kept his brother close!

Of course, with a yelp yarn this disgusting, HBO just had to take a stab. They got a Scream Team to Hand-le this one! Richard “The Omen” Donner helmed this doll scripted by Frank “The Walking Dead” Darabont. The late. great Don Rickles played the ventriloquist with a fistful of terror. As a terror-ific tribute to the creep-comic, Rickles’ voice-thrower shares a last name with artist “Ghastly” Graham Ingels. Don’t be a dummy! Check out this Chiller-Diller below!

Sorry, Folks! The Carnival is closed. All Out and Over, All Out, All Over!