Welcome back, pop-cultured creatures! Comic Con once again brought us some Fang-tastically freaky fright toys, so we’ve gathered up the ones that have us screamin’ the most! As far as we know, none of these toys are possessed with the spirit of a killer… I guess nothing’s perfect. 😉
Here are Comic Con’s most terror-ific toys!
NECA brings the most Horror with frightening new toys for Evil Dead, A Nightmare on Elm Street, Child’s Play, Gremlins, and Friday the 13th! 🙂 Toyark
Behold the many, many new Super-Goodies from DC! Nerdist
Guillermo del Toro’s fantastical films get some fantastical figures. 🙂 Bleeding Cool
(I used to LOVE the shit out of this movie, so seems appropriate to be included in out #TBT offerings…Submitted, of course, by Mr. Goon-y Goon himself, Mr. Andrew Peters. Thanks for the mammaries, Kinky Ho-mie!! 😉 xoxo)
The ‘90s was an odd time for science fiction films. It’s like they couldn’t be made properly and nobody wanted them, but dammit, they were trying. Made on relatively modest budgets for what they were trying to achieve, the films themselves were over ambitious and may have missed the mark, but something about them was noteworthy. Films like The Lawnmower Man, Johnny Mnemonic or Mimic come to mind. When you look at those films, you would be shocked at what the special effects they were able to achieve or what stars they managed to rope into them. Of course, none of them were appreciated upon release, underperforming at the box office, but these kinds of flicks seem to be special to fans of this genre and have gained cult following. However, I think the best example of a smaller budgeted, overhyped (at the time) sci-fi film would be Species. Yeah, remember that movie? Unlike the other ones I mentioned, this actually performed fairly decent and I think we can chalk it up to two things…
Natasha Henstridge’s boobs. After this movie came out, this just became the “did you see Natasha Henstridge’s tits in that one movie” movie. It was all anyone talked about in school and I seem to recall one kid loaning a VHS copy to another kid and need it back by tomorrow before his dad noticed it was missing. Seriously, before rewatching Scream Factory’s new Blu-ray release, the only thing I could recall about this film is that she’s some alien chick and you see her boobs a lot. In fact, I seem to remember this being sold as a very dirty, nearly X rated flick because of the amount of nudity and sex in it. However upon this viewing, I found that although the film does contain those, they weren’t nearly as prominent as I had remembered and it focused more on a cool sci-fi story, even if it is a tad underdeveloped. Seeing as how the film made three times its budget back, I would say that selling the sex angle probably helped it.
Species centers around a young woman named Sil (who at this point in the film is played by a very young Michelle Williams), some sort of alien experiment that seems to be rapidly aging. Her life doesn’t seem as glorious as you may expect an alien visitor to have; she’s kept in a bubble and doesn’t seem to have a whole lot to do and now some Professor X looking dude with eyeliner named Fitch (Ben Kingsley) decides it’s a good idea to gas her. Luckily for her, unfortunately for them, the underestimate the strength of her prison and the efficiency of their security staff as she manages to escape and twists a hobo around backwards while on the run, all before boarding a train. Cardio is important, even if you have a train to catch.
While aboard the train, she pigs out on all kinds of junk food before doubling over in pain and with the magic of early ‘90s terrible CG, we’re able to see that something is growing inside her. She cocoons inside a train car and I really loved the practical effect in this scene. It reminded me of the ghosts from Silent Hill 4: The Room where the ghosts would touch the wall and that goop would grow or something out of a Resident Evil game. It’s was pulsating and oozing until it gives birth to a fully formed adult Sil, now played by Natasha Henstridge, who parades around her wonderful ta-tas in a dozen scenes. I also want to point out that every decades boobs seem different from the following decades. Do you know what I’m talking about? Look at ‘70s boobs compared to ‘80s boobs and compare them to ‘90s boobs. Natasha Henstridge had probably the best ‘90s boobs, hands down.
So, unfortunately the have to throw in this boring thing called plot instead of having Sil run around naked the whole time. Ben Kingsley hires team of scientists – or scientist type people – and some sort of mercenary hunter dude, Preston “Press” Lennox, played by a post Reservoir Dogs Michael Madsen, so he was in pretty decent shape and his voice hadn’t quite sounded like it had a bottle brush down it, but was a little quiet and gruff. And seriously, “Press” Lennox? You may as well name the dude Max Power or Slam Chunklift. He and the ‘too-hot-to-actually-be-a-doctor’ Dr. Laura Baker (Marg Helgenberger) seem to hit it off, but honestly I thought she was possibly the weakest character and the film must’ve thought so too, because they give her a sex scene with some nice side boob, but while this sex scene is intercut with Natasha Henstridge and Alfred Molina’s, you don’t really care. Yes, by the way, I did say Alfred Molina. I bet you thought you’d never see Doc Ock from Spider-Man 2 make his “Oh” face, did you? His character kinda becomes the poon hound outta nowhere in a scene when they go out drinking and I think it’s for exposition sake, because if you haven’t guessed already, the whole point to Sil’s rapid growth and obsession with sex is to mate and procreate.
Now the movie never states if it’s because her species are regular horndogs or if she’s trying to recreate her own kind, so to speak, but as the movie progresses it becomes more urgent that she to her that she bangs. I honestly think this may be the filmmakers way of taking a stab at the audience. It’s basically a cat and mouse type of movie at this point, but with plenty of nudity. To be fair, my summary makes this seem much more simplistic than it actually is. Sil’s quite the clever lady and even kidnaps a woman, cuts off her finger and burns her alive to escape, giving her just enough time to change her hair color and become the predator to her prey, the group of scientists that have been hunting her. She manages to turn the tables and the conclusion is a rather interesting mix of creative and very sexualized HR Giger designed practicals to some PS2 level CG. What I took from the conclusion is that I got to see a see a supermodel try and strangle Mr. Blonde with her nipples. Yup, they shoot out like snakes and wrap around his neck. Didn’t see that coming.
It’s funny to me that everyone remembers this movie for having Natasha Henstridge nude for the majority of it when she actually isn’t, but nobody seems to remember Mathilda May being butt nekkid in damn near every scene she’s in throughout Lifeforce. However, for being a sex symbol in what is ultimately a somewhat sleazy, sci-fi/horror film, Natasha Henstridge does put on quite a good show and I’m not just talking about her nude scenes. She’s just as scary as she is sexy and she doesn’t start out totally evil, but instead her instinct and need to procreate overwhelms her she becomes more viscous. She does this transition very well and as I’m typing that out, I also wonder if that was the filmmakers intent, to take another jab at the hormones of the male audience. Or I’ve been overthinking this film way too much. Another great performance I didn’t mention was Forest Whitaker’s character who is kinda clairvoyant, but very emotional when he senses what feelings the other person is feeling. He plays all ends of the emotional spectrum, really showing off his talent and it’s probably why the guy kept getting better and better work. Well, except for Battlefield Earth.
I mentioned earlier that Scream Factory has released Species in a two disc set with the film being a brand new 4K scan and to be fair, that’s probably why the early ‘90s CG looks as bad as it does. It wasn’t really meant to be seen in that kind of quality. The first disc is the movie itself with two separate audio commentary tracks, one of which includes Michael Madsen, Natasha Henstridge and director Roger Donaldson that I recommend checking out. The second disc is home to all of the special features, like the interviews and behind the scenes looks (which there are several extensive ones included), still galleries, trailers and the alternate ending. The main and brand new featurette, Afterbirth: The Evolution of Species is a great look at the pre to post production work on the film and worth watching.
I never disliked Species, but after viewing it this time around, I think I see it in a totally different light and have a newfound appreciation for it. It wasn’t the ultra sleazy, ultra gory taboo film I remembered it being. Sure, the film touches on sleaze, but it has some class and sexiness to it. Most importantly, it has an interesting story with characters worth investing in. It’s not the greatest sci-fi/horror film out there, but hopefully with this release it gets the respect it deserves. There were three sequels, but Species II is the only one that unites the cast and worth watching. Maybe we will see a newly transferred Blu-ray release of that in the near future?
(Submitted by Mr. Prince Adam…Thanks for the Vampi goodness, Superfriend! 🙂 xoxo)
“Vampirella’s back and on the hunt! Dynamite Entertainment’s acclaimed mistress of the dark continues her supernatural adventures, running a gauntlet of murder and despair across an increasingly imperiled globe. A trio of demoness assassins – the Kerasu Shimei (the ‘Crow Sisters’) – have clawed their into our world, and are intent on building a bloody monument to murder, sin and mayhem, and it will take all of Vampirella’s considerable skill to send them screaming back to Hell…” (Dynamite)
This book continues shortly after the one shot from last issue, where Vampirella was recuperating from her wounds from the battle with Dracula and Le Fanu. The book picks up with Vampirella and Sofia on a stakeout, tracking a trio of gruesome murders where three people of shady character have been crucified, with Japanese Kanji drawn in their blood beside them.Vampirella has been contracted by a mysterious benefactor, who she has yet to reveal to Sofia, Through Vampirella’s inner musing, she reveals that she is keeping her benefactor a secret from Sofia, to not bring her deeper into Vampirella’s world.Vampirella reveals that as much as she enjoys having a human partner, she wants to get Sofia out of this life because the last time she had a human partner, it didn’t end well for either of them.In these quieter introspective moments, we start getting a sense of how attached and how much Vampirella cares for Sofia.As nice as that is, the best parts of these scenes are the insinuation of the mysterious benefactor’s and former human partner.I’m assuming her ex-partner was Adam Van Helsing, who she had a nightmare about in the previous issues.As for who her benefactor is, I have no idea.However, writer Eric Trautmann has me hooked liked a caught fish, waiting to see how both those plot threads play out.In the first seven issues, Sofia is thrust into this monstrous world. She’s intrigued and captivated by it all.Now that she’s had time to process it a little more fully, as a reader, you can see her fear and so can Vampirella, even though Sofia tries to hide it.I love how the writer hasn’t thrust her forward so quickly, to the point where she’s okay with all the weird crap she’s witnessing.She tries to cope by referencing that everything Vampirella does in this volume fulfills every trope from the horror movie genre.She uses smart ass commentary to mask her fears.That’s something I would do.I hope the writers keep using Sofia as a conduit for the audience.The other reason I absolutely loved this volume of issues, is due to the fact that the villains of this issue spring directly out of the first volume.The Three Crow Sisters are Hell-Spawn, who were able to escape hell, when Vampirella’s battle with the Yag-Ath Vermellus, softened the barrier between hell and Earth.The reason why they have killed those 3 people is because they represent cowardice, the immoral and the deceitful.This coupled with killing Vampirella, who represents insolence, dishonors her fellow Vampires and is disloyal to them, will serve as a monument to corruption. These acts will tether them firmly to Earth, preventing them from being dragged back to hell. We also learn that the masks they currently wear are temporary tethers to Earth and amplify their strength and speed.They are very formidable opponents, but she ultimately kills them.However, not before the big revelation that the Crow sisters know of Vampirella’s true origins, whereas, she herself does not.She has memories from different origins, which in actuality are different incarnations of the character in the comics, through the years.In the book continuity, she is not sure what her real past is.This is similar to what Wonder Woman is experiencing post Rebirth. I like this story hook, as it allows new readers to familiarize themselves with multiple possibilities, without doing too much extra “homework.”
Fabiano Neves returns on art and once again does great work.This is going to be odd to say of a Vampirella book but the car chase scene looked good.The art really captures the close quarters and break neck speed of the chase.Also, the exploded car flip diversion Vampirella creates with the car, looked straight out of a Fast & Furious movie, minus Vin Diesel’s monotone acting, while still keeping the beautiful women.The female villains wearing Guy Fawkes, V for Vendetta esque masks, looked creepy as hell.And because the masks aren’t literally V for Vendetta masks, it never feels derivative. Since we essentially had hot vampire vs hot vampire in volume 1, they had to change things up a bit.This is definitely visually striking.I loved the visual of the crucified murder victims being on one hand being a darkly colored page, with his blood being the most colored object, while the other two were shown in black and white.It gave the crime scenes a more mysterious, cold and frightening look and feel to them.The page where Vampirella and Sofia are scouring around the abandoned farmhouse which is pitch black, and their backs are facing the “camera”/reader, is a quintessential horror moment.It leaves you expecting and waiting for something bad or scary to happen.That’s hard for a comic book to pull off, but to be fair, I may have cheated by playing a horror soundtrack as I read this book,
The more I read of Vampirella, the more I like the character and this book.If you thought the story blew its load too early by using Dracula write off the bat, you’d be wrong.I’m constantly impressed with every scroll of the digital page.This character is under appreciated in the comic book world. If you haven’t read this book, or given this character a try, you simply must.If you don’t, you’re truly doing a disservice to yourself and the genre!
“I’d stay away from wasps if i were you, Mrs. Starlin. Socially the queen wasp is on the level with a Black Widow spider. They’re both carnivorous, they paralyze their victims and then take their time devouring them alive. And they kill their mates in the same way, too. Strictly a one-sided romance.”
Ho-wdy, Monster Maniacs!
We’re just buzzing with eXXXcitement about today’s creature feature! It’s a stinging work of terror from the King of the Bs, Mr. Roger Corman! Can your heart withstand the shocking ho-rror of… Released in 1959, The Wasp Woman tells the story of Janice Starlin, played by Susan Cabot. Ms. Starlin is the founder, owner, and spokeswoman for a large cosmetics company. When her company’s sales begin to plummet, her aging appearance is blamed for their decline. In a desperate attempt to appear young, she becomes the willing guinea pig for an eXXXperiment that uses the jelly of the queen wasp to reverse the aging process. Of corpse, it goes wrong and we’re treated to some cl-ass-sick monster madness! Okay, so the plot’s a little groan-worthy (feminist, it ain’t) and it’s more than a little goofy, but this film is a really groovy creepy cheapie. Susan Cabot is actually pretty compelling as the were-insect, and the rest of cast is good(ish ;)). It’s been called one of the “worst movies ever,” but that’s hardly fair. While I do wish it had more of the tit-ular creature, what we do see is spooky stuff. Bonus points for Susan Cabot actually being in the mask! Feel the sting of The Wasp Woman below:
SIDE NOTE: We also rec checking out the 1995 remake with the dreamiest of Dream Warriors, the incomparable Ms. Jennifer Rubin. 🙂 xoxo
Happy Birthday to the always amazing Ms. Shelley Duvall! 🙂
Shelley Duvall is one of the most awesomely eccentric women in entertainment history. She made her film debut in Robert Altman’s utterly bizarre Brewster McCloud. After that, Ms. Duvall teamed up with Altman for six more films: McCabe & Mrs. Miller (1971), Thieves Like Us (1974), Nashville (1975), Buffalo Bill and the Indians, or Sitting Bull’s History Lesson (1976), 3 Women (1977), and Popeye (1980). For her work in 3 Women, she earned the Best Actress prize at the Cannes Film Festival. Beyond Mr. Altman, Ms. Duvall worked with Woody Allen in Annie Hall (1977), Terry Gilliam in Time Bandits (1981), and Steve Martin in Roxanne (1987).
Shelley Duvall went on to become an unconventional icon of fantasy television. In 1982, Duvall narrated, ho-sted, and was eXXXecutive producer on the fantasy anthology Faerie Tale Theatre, which won a Peabody Award, TCA Award and Golden CableACE. The series is quite wonderful, filled with beloved Ho-llywood stars, theatrical effects, and an offbeat charm. Any series that has Vincent Price as the Magic Mirror in Snow White and Jeff Goldblum as the Big Bad Wolf in Three Little Pigs is pure magic in my book. 🙂 In 1985, she created Tall Tales & Legends, another fantasy anthology. That series only lasted 9 episodes, but it earned Duvall an Emmy nomination. It’s worth noting that one of the 9 episodes is an adaptation of ho-rror classic The Legend of Sleepy Hollow. That’s a story we lose our heads over… 😉
Speaking of ho-rror, Ms. Duvall has dabbled in spooky stuff a few times. As most of you know, she played Wendy Torrance in Stanley Kubrick’s The Shining, a favorite of many, many fright fans. She also starred in Frankenweenie (1984) by Tim Burton, who would go on to direct a Faerie Tale Theater episode. In the (jugular) vein of her previous shows, Duvall created a short-lived ho-rror anthology called Nightmare Classics. Keep it kreepy, Ms. Duvall! 🙂
In ho-nor of her birthday, we dug up an episode of Nightmare Classics! It’s a vamp-tastic retelling of Sheridan le Fanu’s Carmilla, starring Meg “Psycho II” Tilly and Roddy “Fright Night“ McDowall. Enjoy, Fright Fiends!
Happy Birthday, Shelley Duvall! You truly are a Shining star! 🙂 xoxo
It’s another frightfully delightful Saturday morning, so you know what that means…. For this positively patriotic party, we’re bringin’ out one big ol’ star! Ladies and Gentleman, Mr. Bugs Bunny! We all know Bugs Bunny is the greatest cross-dressin’, wise-crackin’ wabbit in all of cartoondom… but did you know that he served in the American Revolutionary War? Well, we here at KH are here to educate ya! 🙂 In 1950’s Bunker Hill Bunny, American Minuteman Bugs Bunny defends his fort against Hessian Red Coat Yosemite Sam. And Boy Ho-wdy! You better believe some cartoon shenanigans ensue! 🙂 This ‘toon is cl-ass-ic Looney Tunes in conceivable way, with all the sight gags, eXXXplosions, and Mel Blanc-age a ghoul could possibly want! The short’s superbly funny and the comedic timing is spot-on! Bunker Hill Bunny isn’t one that gets talked about a lot, but it’s simple, looney perfection. It’s the kind of cartoon violence that makes you proud to be an American! Who knew History was this awesome? (Answer: Everyone who’s ever seen 1776, bitches!! 😉 xoxo) Check out the looney lesson in historical happenings via the big black boXXX below:
Ho-wdy Cartoon Creeps! On Tuesday the 19th, a great icon of Ho-rror celebrated his 39th birthday…
Of Corpse I’m talking about Garfield the cat, the comic creation of Jim Davis. What’s that you say? Garfield isn’t a ho-rror icon? Oh, my darklings… I’m sorry to say, but you’re wrong… DEAD wrong!
For starters, Garfield’s Halloween Adventure is the greatest animated Halloween special of all time and forever! Sure, Charlie Brown’s awesome and all, but let’s get real; that “Red Baron” nonsense is a total drag! Plus, there isn’t a single scare in the whole special. That’s why GHA reigns supreme… there’s absolutely no filler and it has scares o’plenty. Only a child with nerves o’ steel can look upon these ghost pirates without shrieking… See? Those things are NIGHTMARE FUEL!
Still not convinced? Feast your eyes and glut your soul on this grim tale from the ACTUAL Garfield comic strip from 1989:
Still a non-believer? Well, I’ve got the perfect pair of Terror Toons for you! From the uber awesome Garfield and Friends, it’s part one and two of The Horror Hostess!
Ahh… isn’t that a tit-le that just speaks to you? It certainly speaks to me! What’s even better is that this two-parter centers around an Elvira parody and features all sorts of ghoulish delights! Monsters! Dragons! Black Magic! Shrinking Victims! Why, it sounds like my birthday! 😉 Another spooky-cool aspect of this episode is that the Ho-rror Ho-stess is voiced by scream queen Brinke Stevens! Now That’s ho-rror cred! Don’t be a scaredy cat… check out the Ho-rror of The Horror Hostess below: